“There is no real ending. It’s just the place where you stop the story.”

― Frank Herbert

Saturday, May 31, 2014

Lunch in the "Ville."

I had lunch in town yesterday.  There's a fellow I know who has decided to pack it in, and move back to the city.  His wife has breast cancer, and they have to go to Atlanta for treatment every week. That's a hellish long drive, and it's hard on her.  He has decided to sell out and move nearer the hospital where the oncologist that is treating her practices.

He's selling out his survival related goods, but doesn't want to deal with Tom, Dick and Harry so he's only negotiating with people he's known a long time.  We struck a bargain on the things I needed (or wanted). It was a little stressful because it's tough to be around people who are having a bad time. Face to face is harder than talking on the internet.  I want to be supportive without being saccharine or displaying emotion. I've known them a very long time. I didn't try to drive a hard bargain, we just agreed on fair prices. I went ahead and paid for the things and will take the truck up there sometime this next week to pick up the items.

The whole thing was made worse by the fact that post planning is going on in the local schools and they were having a school sponsored lunch at the same place, at the same time. There was nowhere to park, and the whole porch, where I like to sit, was taken up as well as most of the inside booths. I hate crowds, it makes me feel anxious and aggravated to be in a crowd. Nothing for it though, as we had scheduled this get together some time back.




My son called me yesterday.  One of his buddies at work was retiring, and "the guys" were going to a bar for a little celebration.  My son told me he was only going to have " a few drinks."  He rarely drinks alcohol. I asked him who he was going with and he said he was driving himself, because he wanted to be able to leave after a decent interval and go home.

I told him no alcohol. Not one.  He's thin and tall, and I'm not sure if he would "blow" a high enough number on one drink if he got pulled over, but I don't want to find out.  He was not pleased with this, as he and I sometimes have an issue about me being a "helicopter parent" who is always hovering over his head. I told him just to order cokes, nobody would know they weren't a rum and coke. He said he wasn't worried about that, but of course he was. Maybe times have changed but when I was his age, anybody who drank soda at that kind of party was going to get teased a lot and their masculinity called into question.   These days though, maybe young people are smarter. DUI is no joke, let that happen and you are screwed for a long , long time. If he lost his license he would lose his job, as he lives too far from work to walk or ride a bike.
I haven't been called from the police station and it's almost 3:45 in the morning so maybe it was much ado about nothing.

I tried some vitamins and minerals today that were suggested to me by an internet friend to help with sleeping.  I don't know if it was the little pills, or just the power of suggestion, but I slept from about nine last night straight through til 3 this morning, and woke up feeling better than I have in a long time. Either way, I'm not going to analyze my good fortune, for fear of spoiling it. It feels great not to be tired.

My wife and I are going to a movie today. I think we will go up to the big lake, have a nice dinner at one of the restaurants on the shore, and then go see "Godzilla."  I'm fine with light entertainment, in fact I prefer movies that don't try to shape my opinion about anything or offer any redeeming values.

27 comments:

  1. Harry,


    (captaincrunch)

    Yeah' I don't like crowds either, nor do I like restourants either for that manner. The less human contact I have the better sometimes.

    I saw and article on Glen Beck's the blaze website. A 19 month old baby was burned by a police stun grenade as it landed in his crib during a no-knock warrant.

    I have lost faith and respect for most law enforcement in this country because of Fourth Amendment violations like no-knock warrants. I think police have become police state thugs and revenue generators.

    I fear this stuff will only get worse, much, much worse.

    My plan for dealing with police is to stay away from them. Don't break any laws of course, but don't interact with or be friendly with police either. The police have become a crime syndicate onto themselves and basically became there own gang.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're going to have to move way, way out to avoid the apparatus of state security. Look where I live, and I've had my share of run in's with obnoxious deputies and state patrolmen. For really heinous things like driving too slow, or saying "no, you can't search my truck." After awhile if you get enough of it you get beat down mentally.

      Delete
  2. HAve a good time. I checked out that defiance show and it wasn't too bad although like most alien shows these days you can't get away from the inter-species relationship crap the entertainment industry is constantly pushing. They simply can't help themselves they have to push it.

    I am gonna wait to catch Godzilla on DVD though. Last movie I went to see was so bad I almost got up and left.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Defiance is ok. Some of the alien women are better looking, and otherwise, than our own. I'm very accepting of that kind of illegal alien.......

      I just want to go to a movie. I want to get out of the area and do something different. Godzilla works for me. I liked the old one. I liked Rhodan, Mothra , too. I felt bad for Rhodan when they killed him off. He got hosed.

      Delete
  3. Have a good time with the Mrs. Country living takes a special breed these days. I love the peace and quite. talk about a big difference going from living near Disney to a small town...I'm in heaven.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's got it's ups and downs. The downside isn't that obvious really, until you start getting older. I went out and mowed for an hour today and quit because the damned grass is still so wet from last nights rain the mower kept stalling out.

      Delete
  4. Enjoy the movie. It is good to get out and about once in a while.

    If it is at all possible, I avoid crowds. The only time I am comfortable in a crowd is when it is family. I guess we qualify as a crowd.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like having my kids come visit, but I'm not so sure about all the dogs and ponies they bring with them.....

      Delete
  5. Hey Harry,


    (captaincrunch)

    that's something else I avoid. Movie theathers

    I ain't been to a movie since 2009. I just wait for the movie to get on iTunes and watch it on the computer.
    People cant behave themselves at movies anymore either, so to avoid stress. I do not go to movies. I also don't have a tv either. I watch tv shows like "Turn" on AMC channel on Sundays at 9:00 pm (or 8:00 pm) at my mothers house. lots of good historical info in Turn (hint' hint')

    Crossing the 'Delaware River scene was cool as well as Washington creating a 'ruse' for Cornwallis. Cornwallis, was gullible enough to fall for it. The English officer corps and there arrogance is fun to watch.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Better be careful about moving away from the beach, CC. Most of your interests seem to center around surfing. I was a bit that way about flying until I had to give it up.

      Delete
  6. Enjoy your movie Harry. I rarely go these days...not many good ones out there. When I do go, I prefer the ones that teach me something. The last one I saw was that Redford film where he is adrift at sea. Not bad.

    With regards to your son, I think you did the right thing. My oldest is 19, he is on his own overseas right now and I don't have any qualms about giving him advice. Been there, done that. Sometimes he chooses to reject my advice. However I still feel duty bound as his father to do so. The world is still nasty and brutish for young adults. I would regret very much if something happened to him because of my lack of involvement. No regrets on my part for dispensing wisdom freely. Hope you think the same. --Troy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Troy, talked to my son today. He blew me off, went ahead and had the "one" drink. It's his life. I didn't have to deal with my dad once I left home because there was no email or cell phones then. But, the thing is, I've learned painful lessons over the years and I'd like to spare my son having to repeat those experiences. I also think that he doesn't always think a situation through all the way before he gets involved in it. Few young men do. A father does what he can and then picks up the pieces when things go wrong. I have a good relationship with my son so he puts up with me pretty well.

      Delete
  7. I heard that Godzilla is actually good. I was surprised. I don't drink when I go out if I am driving. If it's a business situation I may have 1 beer and that is it, assuming I'm there for a hour or two. Mostly I order tea or soda. My co-workers don't understand why I don't drink with them, particularly my management. I've seen way too many situations where drinking with the people you work with has turned out bad, sometimes video'd with their phones and shared. Bad stuff.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kathy, I guess alcohol is still part of the social ritual, then. I am really kind of surprised. In my day we didn't have to worry about videos, but booze fueled some "bad judgement" incidents I can remember and I tend to steer clear of it for the most part now.

      We wound up not going to the movie. I was doing some mowing in the morning, and got a terrific cramp in my leg, so I spent the rest of the day taking it easy. It rained anyway.

      Delete
  8. You could probably be grouped into the helicopter parent crowd. Though in fairness while you might provide input about some stuff you also provide a lot of support so they've kinda got to take the good with the bad.

    Personally I'll have 2 beers over an hour or two then drive. However I probably have 50 pounds on your son and better tolerance. Beyond that either Wifey drives, somebody else drives or I'm staying there. Not much of an issue as 2 leisurely beers covers me for mandatory work fun. The last time I/we went out was around Christmas. My folks watched the kids and Dad drove us.

    From your end a possible way forward in the future is, presuming the place is fairly close by, to say you'll pick up the tab for a cab ride home. That way he can catch a ride there, stay however long and 'have a few' but still leave when he wants.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's a different world than it used to be. The generations are linked more closely now in terms of mutual support, and that inherently means they get into each others business. I was watching a news program recently,and they said not only are the millennials moving back home with their parents in huge numbers out of economic necessity, but so are the baby boomers. They interviewed a woman my age who had moved back in with her 85 year old mom. Closer contact means more interaction, some of which could be classified as "nagging.

      Happy hour at the club on Friday afternoon used to be obligatory. Then the married officers would have to try to drive home if they lived off base, and the local PD would be out in force. Not because drunk driving was considered a big deal then, but for the fines. I had to go get people out of jail as OD many a Friday and Saturday night. My best friend from college, who was my roommate at UNM for four years, eventually became an alcoholic and was "allowed" to resign his commission after he stopped showing up for work as the range officer at Quantico. His Gunnery Sgt covered for him for a long time but eventually the Base CG came out to inspect the range without notice and found my pal wasn't there. That was that. I liked going to the club in Italy at AFSOUTH, the Italians had a very relaxed attitude towards boozing and routinely used staff cars to haul people home who were three sheets to the wind. After I got married, my wife (she was a Navy Lt.) would go to the club with me and that kind of put the damper on things, not just for me but for everybody, so I more or less gave it up. I had a great bar at my house out on the beach, and I used to bring home officers who were TAD to Naples, or coming off the MAU when they were in port, for some great parties. This was not cool with my wife, who didn't mind me bringing people home for dinner, but was not impressed with drunken guys careening around her house. She was hailed as a heroine by my neighbors, who were scandalized by the parties but too Italian and too polite to call the Carabiniere. Italians party but not usually at their houses. They rent restaurants and their parties are epic.

      Good times. Before somebody writes something ugly about me letting my wife change my ways, let me say I have been married for 32 years, happily, so..... Sometimes you have to trade off one thing for another. I beat the odds. Military marriages even back then had a very small chance of success past three years.

      Glenn says he can handle one drink. I say one drink "with the guys" at a bar while the music is blaring and the girls are dancing, can lead to another, to another.... He got home this time and next time I hope he will ride along with a friend and leave his car at work. He has never had so much as a parking ticket so far.

      Delete
  9. I have only been to one movie since we moved here in 2006. I hope you enjoy yours and also that you will be able to sleep better.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Inger, I had another great night of sleep last night. It's amazing how much better you feel when you don't sleep in two to three hour increments.

      We didn't make the movie. I tried to do some mowing in the morning, got a horrific cramp in my leg, and spent the rest of the day taking it easy. I need to finish just a little bit of mowing today, but it rained all night and is raining now, so I doubt it will be today.

      Do you watch the movies on DVD at home? There have been some really good ones in the time since you last went.

      Delete
  10. Harry,

    DUI is a huge thing in most states of Australia, Police can give you a random breath test (RBT) at any time and set up on roads at any time of the day or night. You have to be careful as the limit is .05 (when I was younger it was .08 and you had to be driving all over the road before you would get pulled over).

    It has now gone too far in my opinion, as long as you are not speeding or DUI you can break as many of the road rules as you like and there is not much chance of being pulled over.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sgt,

      It wasn't a big moral issue here in the 70's and 80's, which was when I was still in party mode. If you got busted for it, you paid a fine and that was it. I don't remember there being a lot of horrific wrecks but I guess there might have been and I just didn't know it.

      Now the cops do traffic stops, where they can make you take a breathalyzer test. I don't know what the limits are but I do know that for a small guy or a woman, just one beer can land you in trouble. I also believe, though I have no proof, that the police write down bogus numbers just so they can bust people. Our situation here is exactly like yours. I think if the self righteous crowd could get away with it, they would try prohibition all over again even though it didn't work the first time.

      Delete
  11. Sorry you missed your flick. Sometimes I go to one with my kids but very, very seldom go to one I might want to see. Lone Survivor was the most recent. I go through spells (months) where there aren't any movies I'm interested in renting either and most of thr ones I do like usually didnt do well at the box office. But I've at least got the ticket price whipped, the local blood bank gives tix every time you donate.
    As far as drinking goes, I used to drink some but now hardly any. Once I was working for a Japanese company and got invited to dinner with some of the bosses. I sat beside my Engineer. All night long he drank like a fish but every order he made he had split with me. At the end of the dinner I had quite a few 1/2 mugs of beer around me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The Japanese can drink a lot and still maintain their decorum. Even when they get smashed, they usually don't act out. They don't take "I don't drink" though. Big loss of face.

      The movie doesn't matter. I was just glad to have a quiet day , really.

      Delete
  12. I am not much for crowds either Harry. Fortunately, now I get to pick and choose where I go more--as opposed to when I was a youngster.

    I hope the movie was good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wound up being too tired to go to the movie but we did have a good day, and got some things done around the house. That's just as good, really.

      Delete
  13. You can tell your son that at least one of your readers *has* dealt with the whole DUI loss-of-license fun and games, for a somewhat-extended period of time, and going through the court to regain said license, and is now paying $105 per month through October to maintain a breathalyzer unit on his automobile. Not fun. Yeah, encourage your son to learn, and learn well, from others' bad examples. All the best to you and him and the rest of your family, and ferrets, for that matter. KB

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometimes a fellow is just in the wrong place at the wrong time. As I told Glenn, this family has it's hands full just getting through each week, and we damn sure don't need legal bills and judicial problems on top of it all. I was irked he went ahead and had that one drink. I don't trust the police, and I don't know what the limits are now. Sorry you had to deal with the hassle, and I hope you can get it behind you soon.

      Delete
  14. This fellow *was* in the wrong place at the wrong time, but had developed a bit of a problem, and a second offense within a certain period of time, well, that led to a bit of an extended time of license loss. Lesson learned, I truly hope, and it's worked out well-acquired a decade-old, immaculately-maintained vehicle from a relative of mine who had too many cars for the laughably-low "blue book" value of same, I'm old enough and it's truly been sooo long since I've had a ticket that my insurance is reasonable, and life's good, really. Other than the lovely Draeger Interlock 7000 I'm renting for the next few months, getting back into motoring is just ducky. I know you're not overly-religious, but have enough of a religious background you, or your wife, maybe, know the story about the rich young guy in the New Testament who dies and goes to Hell and Lazarus, the beggar, I think, dies and goes to Heaven, and is in "The Bosom of Abraham" and the rich guy begs God, or maybe Abraham to put some water on his tongue to cool the flames and wants Lazarus to be sent back to Earth and warn his five brothers to do whatever they need to do to avoid the eternal flames of Hades. Well-sir, I've been there and come back, in a kind of light-duty, metaphorical way, so I'm telling any and all, WATCH IT and don't go down that road. All the best, although I don't chime in much, I couldn't resist in this case, and as I've stated before, fell in love with the blog about the time you mentioned the appearance of ARs at Wal-Mart and your woes with the whole solar-panel/electric backup plan. KB

    ReplyDelete