Sunday, July 20, 2014

Weird Al. "First World Problems."

How many people do you know who are just like this?  I know several.  I am related to some of them.

"First World Problems"

My maid is cleaning my bathroom, so I can't take a shower,
When I do, the water starts getting cold after an hour!

I couldn't order off the breakfast menu, cause I slept in till two,
Then I filled up on bread, didn't leave any room for tiramisu.

Oh no, there's a pixel out in the corner of my laptop screen,
I don't have any bills in my wallet small enough for the vending machine.

Some idiot just called me up on the phone, what!? Don't they know how to text? OMG!

I got First World Problems!

I bought too many groceries for my refrigerator,
Forgot my gardener's name, I'll have to ask him later.

Tried to fast forward commercials, can't - I'm watching live T.V,
I'm pretty sure the cookies in this airport lounge ain't gluten free!
My barista didn't even bother to make a design in the foam on the top of my vanilla latte!
I got First World Problems!

Can't remember which car I drove to the mall,
My Sonicare won't recharge, now I gotta brush my teeth like a neanderathal!
The thread count on these cotton sheets has got me itching,
My house is so big, I can't get WiFi in the kitchen.
Uh, I had to buy something I didn't even need, just
so I could qualify for free shipping on Amazon!

I got First World Problems!



  1. I gotta drive for hours one way to take care of exotic pets....

    errr never mind :)

    1. They aren't pets, they are superior beings with fur.

      After the ferrets take over the world, they'll be looking you up, sure enough!

  2. Im always irritated by people who dismiss someone elses problems by calling them 'first world problems'. To me, it implies that somehow because I work to not live in poverty and squalor its somehow okay when something happens to me that I don't like.

    1. Well, it would depend on the problem. Most of the problems in this song remind me of people who couldn't pour sand out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel, but they live like God Kings. They are vacuous.

      I am also reminded of some people I know who are worthy enough persons, but their primary concerns are things like getting their hair cut just so, or how a pair of sandals and a pair of bermuda shorts look together.

  3. Think we can all get sucked into these occasionally. It is a good reminder that the worst thing you are dealing with at any point in time is still an annoyance, even if it is that your favorite local restaurant does not deliver.

    1. I guess so, though I think the song is aimed at what used to be called "the beautiful people."

  4. Spoilt brats comes to mind...

    1. Yes, and we have a lot of them. When I worked for my old company, I met a good many. They tended the be the offspring of men who had built up a company from scratch. So they had big paying jobs which they were not qualified for and did not earn. I didn't like them. Maybe it was envy to some extent but primarily I dislike pretense. This was before "poseur" became a commonly used word in the U.S. but that is what they were.